Wanting to let someone in.

I was going to post a quote from Leave Myself Behind by Bart Yates, but I just discovered that I did so about a year ago.

I moved to Seattle for many reasons. I know some of these are back-explaninations, revising my rationales for decisions long after they’ve been made and executed. (Hey, I’m not talking about going to war or something, just moving across the country on a moment’s notice okay?) One reason that keeps coming back is that I wanted to be able to find someone to let into my head. Its a scary place up there sometimes, and I don’t quite understand everything I think all of the time, but being able to let someone in emotionally and intellectually is something I’ve wanted for, well hell nine or ten years. Its not that I don’t have people that I’m really intimate with emotionally and intellectually, but I also would kind of like another gay guy to share things with. (Or well a straight guy who is comfortable cuddling in bed naked with another guy and kissing him will do as well…)

I think some people may think that in some ways I’m really open with a lot of people, and thats true, but there is really more of me that I want to explore with someone.