Path to Enlightened Insanity

I went out with my three friends from my speech class after class tonight, and we went through four pitchers of beer and lots of conversation.. It was really fun… We wandered through all sorts of interesting topics including vegetarianism, GMOs, religion, marriage, and some I’m sure I’m forgetting.. After that we went to a wonderful french fries only restaurant called frites..

A wonderful night that most likely wouldn’t have happened after getting drunk after class in the midwest..

I just went to my Aunt and Uncle’s house for Thanksgiving. This is the second year in a row that I’ve gone there, and I’m liking the tradition.

I dunno about you but my life has been devoid of traditions for quite some time. (And yes, I’ve had that perky little song from fiddler going through my head.)

Traditions are important, because they remind you who you are, and help weave structure into your life to help you know where you’ve come from and where you’re going.

I know my parents have started reading this, so I’ll keep this short and tactful: After they divorced the traditions that our family had just fizzled out the window. Not all at once mind you, but Christmas is no longer the joyous time that I remember it, instead it feels like some former vestige of itself, where perhaps we all get together and tiptoe around the tension, or some years we don’t and it turns into a lets shuttle between everyone’s houses.

This is one of the reasons I really want to find the right guy, so that I can settle down and start making some of our own traditions… That sounds so domestic, and perhaps boring, but I had a counselor who told me once that routines are what allow us to have a structure to build upon.

Perhaps this is one of those reasons I jumped in the car and left Seattle. I want to start building a home and traditions, but I can’t see myself doing that in the midwest..

Cherish the traditions you have, they’re more important than you know.

Given the recent midterm election and the renewed focus on what the United States should do with Iraq, I feel it is important to state my position on the issue.

While I stand by my previously expressed position that invading Iraq was a bad idea, I do not support a unilateral withdraw of troops from Iraq. For better or worse the United States is responsible for the situation in Iraq. While it may be convenient to state that this is George W. Bush’s folly, the United States as a country is responsible for the situation.

Just as a parent owes to a child a good start in life, the United States owes Iraqis a stable manageable start to their newfound country-hood without Saddam Hussein.

To withdraw our troops without stabilizing Iraq is morally reprehensible and is not a legacy any American should want for their country.

Good things

• I had a good date tonight..
• I have had some good interviews in the past two weeks with one company that I really want to work for
• I’ve become very aware of the fact that I need to keep my head up, and stay positive.

But the real reason to write is that I’ve posted my first entry to Lets Throw Money Into the Market (Intelligently), my blog about my stock picks, et al. Like the Path to Enlightened Insanity via Defacted Musings, this is a selfish endeavor.

Enjoy, the entry took far longer to write, was longer than I thought it would be, but I’m very pleased..

Yesterday (Wednesday) I grabbed the CLEP Official Study Guide, and took the practice exam for the Analyzing and Interpreting literature. I got a more or less passing score on the practice exam, so I decided that:

1. I could waste a bunch of time by studying for the exam
2. or given that I had more or less passed a version of the exam I could take the official exam, if I passed great, if I didn’t I could retake it in six months after studying

I chose number two. And things turned out really well, I got a score of 64. The scale is 20 to 80, and 51 is considered the spot where they grant credit. So I started my day off by knocking out a class that had threatened to delay my graduation date.

Next on the list was a phone call to Jenni to gloat about said exam while driving to IKEA to pick up some Swedish groceries. Whereupon arriving I managed to get in and out in 30 minutes, a feat in and of itself, but I added in a quick snack of Swedish meatballs.

Next up, a car wash, because the poor thing had pollen dust all over it.

After that I returned home to unpack groceries, do a little bit more work for my speech class at 6. I then hopped in the car, grabbed some Starbucks on the way and went to class. (There is nothing like preparing well in advance, but doing it last minute is just more fun.) One of my speeches was 2 seconds short (easy to do when you’re going for a 30 to 45 second envelope) and the other came in right on the nose.. so it was a great day…

Oh, and I’ve avoided social psychology and beer tonight, so that probably has something to do with it.

So, I’ve come to the conclusion that the best way to deal with my online discussions in class is to drink a beer while reading the discussion. This is mostly because I’ve found the quality of writing and thought on the discussion boards is so fucking poor much of the time, to even things up I’d have to have three or four beers. So one just sort of takes the edge off the differential.

Yes, I know that is condescending and rude. But, it is justified. So, I’ll give you an example to illustrate my point. This is from my 300-level social psychology course:

Subject: self-esteem

When I was younger I had really low self-esteem. I had a small chest and a big gap in my teeth. I looked like a little boy when I was actually a 13 yr old girl. I got braces and went from being called Gap to metal mouth. A step up but it still kept me down ( I never smiled or talked much) and I still looked like a boy. When I was a freshman in high school I finally got a girlish figure but that just made things worse I looked like a girl and that just caused other problems. I didnt really have a great self-esteem until I moved here to Ohio and made friends with a girl who was a junior at the time and played water polo. By getting me involved in sports and also me getting my braces off I got a big self-esteem boost and felt like I was more than a girl or a look I was a person who had feelings and wasnt going to put up with people putting me or anyone else down. Just as an example my senior year in high school I was the only senior on the water polo team and there were five juniors so when I got hurt and was out for the season they took over. One of them got onto a power trip and started telling the younger teammates that they were stupid and worthless players not deserving to play on this team. Well I was at that practice and she didnt say anything like that ever again because I told her that she had no right to put people down like that and she had no reason to critisize people just because she wasnt happy.

Just because someone treats you badly doesnt mean you can take it out on others because that jut causes a big cycle of low self-esteem and anger and saddness.

Yes, that passes for 300 level college discussion in Kentucky. Now do you understand why I got the hell out of there?

I have come to realize I really love some television programs.. I’m an addict for 24, I wish Six Feet Under will never end, Studio 60 is fun and promising (hell its Aaron Sorkin’s work.), and of course my ongoing affinity for all things Star Trek..

I hate television. Or at least what it has become for most people…

I came home at seven, at that time my roommate had the television on, it stayed on, and she watched the same channel until she went to bed at 10PM.. I didn’t watch her every moment, but I’m pretty sure she didn’t move from the couch. (Okay, in her defense she’s got a cold, but she’s exhibited this behavior before.) This is of course while the dishwasher has needed emptied for at least two evenings. (its her responsibility to empty the dishwasher)

Count one, I despise what people allow themselves to become when they watch television.

Next, I had the pleasure(?) of watching live TV on the airplane when I was flying JetBlue to NYC. Now, I honestly don’t know when the last time I sat in front of a television screen for that long was, but I got bored. I’d be watching something interesting, and then they’d go to what seemed like 10 minutes of boring commercials. I’d flip around attempting to find something better than commercials to watch, it actually was tedious to get some continuous entertainment.

Count two, The commercials run for far too long, and are uninteresting, detracting from the audience’s attention to the main show.

While we were waiting to take off I found a fun show on the History Channel about the “Texas Roswell Incident.” It was alright, but it would’ve been better if the producers could’ve just turned in a twenty-five minute, well and succinctly told episode, instead of having to repeat themselves and find fluff to fill the extra twenty minutes of running time that the show had to fill to get up to its 45 minute requirement (which plus commercials equals an hour of television.)

One of the reasons I love movies is that the length is tailored to the story the filmmaker wants to tell. a filmmaker can make a movie thats a short and 12 minutes long, or a sixteen hour epic (or more!). Thus they do not have to write into the 22 minute blocks (30 with commercials) of television.

Any school teacher knows the way to bore themselves is to require their students to write papers well beyond the length that they’re capable of; sure, the student will turn in a paper of the appropriate length, but it’ll have too much fluff and crap that the paper could do without.

Count three, the scheduling structure of television networks distorts and makes it difficult to do good art.

So what is the positive to this? Well for one, Google bought YouTube.. Which in and of itself isn’t much to get all jumpy about. Ultimately, I services like YouTube will suppliant television. The thing is by forcing people to interact, to choose what to watch instead of having it forced at them people become better consumers of “television shows” instead of couch potatoes. By being a digital medium commercials can be more targeted, satisfying both viewers and advertisers. Direct digital distribution will become cheaper that the scatter shot distribution of broadcast, and even cable television. (No I haven’t read The Long Tail yet, but I’ve read Chris Anderson’s Wired articles on the same subject.) Finally, I think we’ll get better, more engaging entertainment and documentaries by freeing creators from the fixed constraints of the television schedule.

So, I can’t wait for this cruddy era of television to end, and a new engaging and artistically fulfilling one to begin.

Why this entry is coming now and not two and a half months ago I do not know.

(Although I did just watch 13 Conversations About One Thing, if that has anything to do with it…)

I’ve realized one of the reasons I left Cincinnati is that I was tired of waiting. I kept setting goals to “leave Ohio”, then after meeting that one by moving to Kentucky (yeah its a lateral move, despite what the map says), I set a goal to “leave the midwest after….” At some point I just decided, why wait? After set off on this journey, a friend said to me that happiness is something you decide to go and get.. (Okay I think she actually said it a little differently, but roll with it here.)

I want the life I’m living to be one of direct and deliberate choice, not a series of accidents that started with some bad bookkeeping in the early 1990s by a guy working in West Carrolton, Ohio.. (Yes, I can trace my presence in the midwest to a specific incident by someone else, hey I was twelve and didn’t have a say in the matter…)

A barrista, a friend said to me a few moments before I made the decision to leave, “go for it, just don’t get stuck in Nebraska, cuz that would suck.” Honestly what did I have to lose?

An amazing amount. But I had to chart my own course, to decide to be responsible for where I was going, instead of just riding the pinball paddles of chance. (Don’t get me wrong, it was a high scoring game, but the ball doesn’t decide where it wants to go.)

Friendships have carried on, my health is good, work has taken a little bit of a step back, but my new job seems saner than the old one (albeit a bit less engaging). Admittedly my insanely amazing skills of managing a lack of money have come in handy although I’m meeting my obligations as far as everyone is concerned.

So I got tired of waiting and gambled. So far the early cards look really good…

I wonder what my counselor from my final days at Wright State would say? Jo are you out there? I think she’d be proud of me.

(oops, I wrote this last night, but forgot to click the “Send to Weblog” button….)

I’ve started grabbing a quick dinner here and there at McDonald’s. In general the ones in Seattle are cleaner and nicer than the ones in Ohio, and they’ve got some snazzy new menu items.

So I had a fun experience tonight that resulted in me sending this off to McDonald’s Customer Service:

I went to the store 1530 3rd Ave in Seattle, WA to have a quick dinner while waiting to catch a bus.

Behind me was a couple and the lady placed her left foot below her right knee, so that the side of her shoe was touching the seat, a common sitting position. An employee named Lonnie came over and asked her to take her foot off the chair. The couple reasonably rebutted that only the side of her shoe was touching the chair, not the sole of the shoe. Lonnie impolitely and aggressively insisted that the lady remove her foot from the chair. The lady was visibly annoyed and a yelling match between the couple and Lonnie ensued, and the couple left the McDonald’s.

I recognize the value in an orderly and clean dining room, and I do not dispute the right of this McDonald’s location to ask that no shoes be placed on the chairs, but this was handled in a wholly inappropriate manner by Lonnie. His phrasings and tone made what should have been a polite and simple interaction into a disturbance for anyone nearby.

I am a former McDonald’s manager and upon witnessing this interaction I would have counseled Lonnie that he took an incorrect tone with two paying customers, and I would have documented subsequent incidents.

The correct way to prevent this situation in the future is to clearly post the rules, and instruct lobby employees to politely but firmly enforce the rules, referencing them when necessary, and escalating the issue if necessary.

Annoyed at this situation, I was compelled to leave a mess for Lonnie to clean up; I have seen far more polite McDonald’s employees have to clean far more disgusting messes than the one I left. I recognize that this was not the correct thing to do, but I also recognize that Lonnie was running the dining room as if he were a prison warden, and I made a conscious decision to rebel against Lonnie’s authoritarism.

I would like my money refunded due to the disurbance that Lonnie precipitated, which disturbed my dining experience.

Regards,

Cliff Barnard

Yeah fun wasn’t it? Oh my mess.. I have to share the little mess that I made. I started by dropping a few french fries and grinding them into the floor, (I hated this when I worked for McDonalds.) I dropped a napkin on the floor, I took my nugget sauces turned them upsidedown on the table, and ground whatever remaining sauce was left into the table. I then packed up my things except for a magazine, put my feet up on the chair and waited for Lonnie to do his little king of the lobby dance, while I pretended to ignore him while I was reading my magazine. After he walked over I acknowledged him, took my foot off the chair, and knocked over my soda, crushing the cup to ensure that my root beer would flow all over the table, had a little yelling match of my own with Lonnie and left..

What can I say, its fun to piss off authority, especially those who overdo what little authority they have…

I’m cleaning out a bunch of small things right now. One of those that I kept meaning to do was a note on the blog regarding the time zone on inmff.net.

After some thinking about it and research I’m going to keep it on US Eastern Time. The reasons for this are:

• The ISP that inmff.net is hosted on, panix.com, is located in US Eastern Time in New York City.
• I’ve not adjusted the edit dates and times of entries that I’ve made from other time zones in the past.
• Movable type 2.63, the blogging software that I use, (I know I’m using an old version, but I’m happy with it and don’t feel like mucking with a major upgrade.) only supports one time zone for the whole blog, not per entry, so if I were to change the time zone of the blog, it would redo all the previous entries..
• I was born in Eastern Time.